Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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