I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
