how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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