oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
