Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
He is an equal opportunity slut.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
