Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I didn't notice because vodka
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
