We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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