oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
