This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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