Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
a search helicopter?!
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Randomize
