WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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