He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
