the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Randomize
