actually, I'm a sock model
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Randomize
