Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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