how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize