Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
My ass is underappreciated
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Randomize