Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I will be naked everywhere
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
