sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
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