We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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