I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
