my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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