i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
