whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
