Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
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