It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize