When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
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