I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Randomize
