Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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