And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Randomize
