He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
