youre lurking in front of me
My hand turned me down
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
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