It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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