dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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