I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
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