Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
