Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
