No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
