no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
