I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
