I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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