I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
being pregnant is like rehab
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
