Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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