We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Randomize
