Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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