I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I don't deserve a penis
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
