You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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