if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
