Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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