that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
