Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
